TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize
