you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
