You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
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is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
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Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
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