My hand turned me down
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
