Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(770): View more from Georgia

The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen

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(770): The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen http://tfl.nu/8l9o

Replies (44) Good night (755) Bad night (4334)
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(603): View more from New Hampshire

my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes

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(603): my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes http://tfl.nu/2y76

Replies (14) Good night (725) Bad night (3318)
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(865): View more from Tennessee

Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?

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(865): Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious? http://tfl.nu/lazc

Replies (106) Good night (6864) Bad night (1041)
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(678): View more from Georgia

she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy

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(678): she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy http://tfl.nu/57ze

Replies (17) Good night (6154) Bad night (1312)
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(651): View more from Minnesota

Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?

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(651): Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup? http://tfl.nu/4ljj

Replies (15) Good night (1743) Bad night (3643)
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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you

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(306): funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you http://tfl.nu/jsw9

Replies (22) Good night (5335) Bad night (1559)
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(360): View more from Washington

My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.

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(360): My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this. http://tfl.nu/p7t1

Replies (17) Good night (1154) Bad night (4818)
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(703): View more from Virginia

i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated

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(703): i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated http://tfl.nu/8rnc

Replies (13) Good night (4651) Bad night (1221)
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(260): View more from Indiana

People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them

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(260): People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them http://tfl.nu/5lb9

Replies (4) Good night (1727) Bad night (803)
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(443): View more from Maryland

Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?

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(443): Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version? http://tfl.nu/d18m

Replies (5) Good night (1788) Bad night (637)
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(262): View more from Wisconsin

Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.

(262): View more from Wisconsin

I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.

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(262): Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward. (262): I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win. http://tfl.nu/2vvo

Replies (18) Good night (793) Bad night (1773)
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(404): View more from Georgia

I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.

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(404): I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life. http://tfl.nu/rfqb

Replies (3) Good night (1380) Bad night (674)
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(678): View more from Georgia

So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.

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(678): So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch. http://tfl.nu/2vud

Replies (2) Good night (905) Bad night (350)
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(505): View more from New Mexico

Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??

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(505): Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again?? http://tfl.nu/9q8l

Replies (2) Good night (1186) Bad night (317)
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(206): View more from Washington

after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.

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(206): after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted. http://tfl.nu/6q2s

Replies (5) Good night (475) Bad night (690)

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