Texts From Last Night

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  (520): View more from Arizona

  In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.

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  (520): In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties. http://tfl.nu/3p0b
  Replies (32) Good night (7855) Bad night (1288)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog

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  (908): you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog http://tfl.nu/njtd
  Replies (6) Good night (1375) Bad night (3116)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.

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  (503): Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter. http://tfl.nu/kpej
  Replies (15) Good night (5413) Bad night (1250)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.

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  (303): Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird. http://tfl.nu/kz0v
  Replies (5) Good night (1064) Bad night (3483)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.

  (734): View more from Michigan

  Your friend and I already don't get along

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  (404): I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend. (734): Your friend and I already don't get along http://tfl.nu/d3pe
  Replies (4) Good night (3590) Bad night (885)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with

  (509): View more from Washington

  Isn't life beautiful?

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  (360): So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with (509): Isn't life beautiful? http://tfl.nu/f406
  Replies (13) Good night (2165) Bad night (1147)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score

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  (608): his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score http://tfl.nu/rd1e
  Replies (7) Good night (1499) Bad night (618)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits

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  (410): I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits http://tfl.nu/1cr3
  Replies (5) Good night (1009) Bad night (1127)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send

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  (925): I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send http://tfl.nu/fpx2
  Replies (5) Good night (916) Bad night (419)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.

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  (603): There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here. http://tfl.nu/dbwx
  Replies (2) Good night (881) Bad night (364)
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  (209): View more from California

  I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.

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  (209): I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately. http://tfl.nu/q37y
  Replies (0) Good night (506) Bad night (420)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM

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  (+61): A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM http://tfl.nu/lo1g
  Replies (2) Good night (776) Bad night (345)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.

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  (619): You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off. http://tfl.nu/vzep
  Replies (3) Good night (269) Bad night (484)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  My legs feel like baby dolphins

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  (919): My legs feel like baby dolphins http://tfl.nu/f40w
  Replies (0) Good night (436) Bad night (173)
• Favorite

  (469): View more from Texas

  Bring me that man meat

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  (469): Bring me that man meat http://tfl.nu/j03f
  Replies (1) Good night (335) Bad night (120)

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