I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Randomize