you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
