Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
