How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Randomize
