It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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