I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
