Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
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