can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
