oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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