Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize
