If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
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