omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
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The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
It's official drugs can't kill me
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
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my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
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