my room smells like sperm. sweet.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
Houston, we have a blender
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Randomize
