if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
