I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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