Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
My feet surprised me
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
