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yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
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