Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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