Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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