The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
