Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
