it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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