Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
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My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
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True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize