Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Congratulations! We have a period
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