of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
