that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize