That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
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And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
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As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
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