You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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