i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
