Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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