when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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