I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
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2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
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I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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