let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
