yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
