Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
