porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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