he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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