Your tits are I can't wait for
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Randomize
