My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
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