I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Randomize
