Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
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the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
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