Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
You're like the curious george of whores
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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