Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
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I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
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Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
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