Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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