she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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