just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize