Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need Xanax blowdarts
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize