I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
